1979

My mother told me that I rarely cried when I was first born. She told me I was a content baby and for two weeks she held me constantly and told me everything I needed to know. After the adoption was complete I went to live with my new mother. I asked my adopted mother if I cried a lot when she brought me home. Once again I heard no. You would think that after being taken from my mother and given to a stranger I would have cried. Was this my first lesson in relationships? People come, people go, I only have myself so no use crying about it especially when I couldn’t control the situation.

I found Nancy Verrier’s book Primal Wound, Understanding the Adopted Child. I’ve never been scared to read a book before… but I was about this one. I even left it wrapped in the plastic it came in like some how it’s contents might leak out and absorb into me when I wasn’t ready for it. At this moment where this intense fear and emotion about what I might read or learn about myself lived… I knew I was on the right road.

There are many theories about this stage in the development of a child. The severing  of this connection between biological mother and infant and the ultimate surrender of that infant to a stranger. The concepts about adoption fascinate me and make me want to delve deeper into psychology of it. However, for purposes of this project I wanted to explore how this initial event and subsequent personal experiences have contributed to the shaping of my identity as a teacher and how this identity contributes to my view of the people in my world.